I had such hopes for this weekend. I wanted to get up really early, that was my first goal ruined by my inability to get up on time. I think it was like ten or eleven when I finally turned the alarm off, and when I managed to actually get out of bed, it wasn’t early anymore, definitely late, like all of the restaurants and fast-food places were way past their breakfast menus by now.

Not that I wanted to go out for breakfast. My plan was to make breakfast, my own breakfast, a huge meal, one of those morning feasts. But, even if I had gotten up early, I wouldn’t have had anything in the house, nothing except that bulk package of bacon. But the bread, it was all moldy, I guess I should have maybe gone to the store yesterday and picked up some fresh bread.

And the milk, it was the same with the milk. It wasn’t moldy, but it was the milk equivalent of moldy bread. Sometimes I have to really get my nose in the carton to see if the milk is still good, but this time, nope, all I had to do was open up the top and I knew, my nose knew, the whole house knew that the milk had gone bad.

So now I had all of this coffee brewing, I still wanted the coffee, but black? It’s kind of a warm day for hot black coffee. And so after a few minutes of just putzing around in my pajamas, I put on a pair of shorts and went to Dunkin Donuts. I had a large iced coffee and something like six donuts. I meant to only have three, but I couldn’t even stick to that modest goal, because the lady behind the counter was like, “It saves money to buy six.” And even though I said, “No thanks, I only want three,” she was just like, “Well, it’s the same amount of money, so I’m just going to give you six.”

And of course I ate six donuts. And now I just want to lay down and take a nap. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe I can make something of myself tomorrow.